September is my month

According to my Chinese horoscope, 2007 is a very good year for me. It further says that financially, I should be better off in September.

Next week, I’m officially starting with my new career as Sales Manager with a multinational. Yes, after all the debating with myself, I decided to take yet another risk, decline the offer from the other company after I had already resigned, and seek out other opportunities anew. Luckily, I was accepted at my new company, which does not require any pay cut at all. In fact, career-wise, benefits-wise, and salary-wise, it’s an utter improvement over my last job.

This past week too, I received at least six offers to do freelance writing, seo and project management work. When it rains, it pours.

Also, just yesterday, my friend and I finalized details for our new online venture – an online shop.

Perhaps it’s ‘The Secret’ at work. Or could be plain coincidence. Either way, I’m not complaining.

Burning Ferrari

One of the first things that came to mind: Iilan na nga lang ang Ferrari sa Pilipinas, nabawasan pa ng isa.

Photos from http://www.pinoyxbox.com/phpnuke/modules.php?name=Forums&file

=viewtopic&t=11111&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=0

Wedding Traditions: What the Wedding Candle, Cord and Veil Symbolize

There are different versions, but this is what I learned from our pre-cana seminar at the Shrine of Jesus.

Candle

The candle is a symbol of the presence of Jesus in the couple’s lives and of the love that they must keep aflame all the days of their lives.
*Some believe that the candle that blows out first points to whoever will die first. Riiiight.

Veil

The veil is pinned on the bride’s head and on the groom’s shoulder. This forms the silhouette of a house, symbolizing that you now have the blessing to live under one roof.

Cord

This is my favorite. The cord means that you will now have to walk at the same pace towards one direction. Walang iwanan.

Unity Candle

Not required, but definitely nice to have. It’s something that you as a couple can light on your anniversary as you offer prayers of thanks, praise and for special intentions, maybe.

Career Pathing or Cash

When I was working from home, I would watch Oprah twice a day, first at 9AM and then at 1PM . She has left me with some really good things to think about, one of which is her concept of luck. To her, luck is preparation meeting opportunity.

After months of so-so job hunting, I received an interesting offer. It involves a company that is known to be a hunting ground for recruiters both here and abroad, huge income potential through commissions, and a more challenging career. It has all things that would appeal to me at this point, except that it also entails a 50% pay cut on my base pay. In Oprah’s luck equation, the opportunity is present, but the preparation part is not. It’s a choice between career pathing and cash, and it’s a tough one .

I could have easily accepted the offer a year ago, when the priority for building a family fell significantly behind career pathing. But, the former has now caught up. I don’t think I can afford to make any financial sacrifices now but at the same time, it is getting a little bit too late for me to take the steps towards the right career.

It seems easy, let this offer go as it’s simply not good enough. There’s just too much risk. But then I get to thinking that in all things, sacrifices come before the benefits can be reaped. I have never made any sacrifices for work. I don’t think I’ve even been really challenged at work, ever. Would this be the right time then? If I’m not prepared for this opportunity, should I get myself ready for it? This could still be an opportune time since we don’t have kids yet.

Oprah said that her secret to success is that she never, for one minute, focused on the money. You know you’re doing the right thing when you can do your job without getting paid for it. I am confident I’ll be good at the job I’ve been offered, I know it. Whether or not I’ll enjoy it is a different story, but I have a strong feeling I will.

But when you’re on your own, building a family, planning for a house that you’ll have built, can you lose sight of the money? It is a huge deciding factor now more than ever.

Hay, kagulo. Excuse the train of thought, I am debating with myself.

On Our Own

How time flies! Has it really been six months since we irrevocably committed to forever?

It’s been relatively easy for me and I hope it has been for Alfred too. Our biggest hurdle has just been keeping our budget in check, but that seems to be a perennial problem for almost every household. Overall, I think we’re doing quite well.

I believe the secret, at least for us, is that we have our own place. My dad laid down this condition when we asked for his permission to get married. He said that even if they or Alfred’s family can accommodate us, we have to live on our own. For the uninitiated, this is fairly uncommon for Filipinos. Many continue to live with their families even after they get married, with kids and all.

Anyway, I’m glad that my dad thought this way. No offense to either families.  I can’t ask for a better set of in-laws, and I think Alfred can now say that about my parents too.  But this arrangement has made our adjustment to married life much less effortful.

Sure, we’re thousands and thousands poorer from rent and bills but now, we rely only on each other.  Our personal space reinforces that there’s only two of us in the marriage equation and at the end of the day, we make it work. Nobody else. I think that sets a pretty good foundation for our marriage.

Of course it will be a completely different story when we have children already. I know I will beg for all the help I can get. But even then, I will insist on our own private zone. With too much help, we might become too dependent on our parents and independently self-sufficient from each other that we’ll forget to take responsibility. That’s a scary thought.

P.S.

This post is inspired by some new developments over the weekend. We’re already finalizing the blueprint of the house that we’ll have built soon! If all goes well, it shall be ready by April. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Strawberry Centerpieces

My cousin just booked a very interesting supplier for her wedding – Strawberry Dreams. They will provide chocolate-coated strawberries, which will double as nibblers and table centerpieces. I can imagine them to be a conversation starter.

I’m not crazy about this particular arrangement, but I’m sure they will make some adjustments. My cousin wants the strawberries completely covered in chocolate to better match her chocolate brown-apricot motif.

The idea of edible centerpieces came naturally to both of us. The love for food runs in the family indeed.

Wedding Regrets

My blog stats reveal that many stumble upon my site via wedding-related keywords. So I thought I’d share some of the things that I would have done differently for my wedding. Hopefully, my friends who are engaged to be married next year (second wave of wedding marathon, woohoo!) can learn from this.

About two weeks before the wedding, I got infected with the wedding planning fatigue, a feeling apparently shared by most brides and all grooms. I reached the point where I just wanted it done and over with. As a result, I let go of certain details, which are now my main causes for regret.

Here goes. If I could redo my wedding, I would..

Get an additional photographer. When Kapatid started playing and the more ‘mature’ guests started leaving, we couldn’t find Nelwin or Joel nearby. We had to get their attention from the other side of the tent. This was a problem because we really wanted to focus our attention on the band already. Plus of course, a few more candid photos would have been nice.

Get a longer veil. Michele thought that my veil should not cover my dress. I thought, hey she’s the expert and she knows better. What I didn’t think was that she would be open to my concerns and that I should have at least brought it up. I just take comfort in the fact that everybody else does long veils already.

Sometimes too I think my gown would have looked better if we went with her initial color palette for the gown, the one with mocha bridal satin for the bottom part. But then again, my mom wouldn’t be too happy about that.

Have a fireworks display. Given budget constraints, we demoted this item from our must-have’s to our nice-to-have’s. Looking back, fireworks would have been perfect against the bay setting. This would have also made up for the lull in the program, which apparently only Alfred and I noticed. The coordinators had to get more of our friends to give speeches while waiting for the band to set up.

Practice our first dance. Our first dance to Foo Fighters’ Walking After You felt awkward. I wish we had time to choreograph.

Finish our rounds to have our pictures taken with all our guests. We were so worried that our guests were already getting bored, so we cut this short and cued our hosts to begin the program. We didn’t realize it was still so early.

This brings me to the next and final item.

Know that your guests are most probably enjoying much more than you think they are. So relax and let go.

Thankfully, my regrets are very very minor in the grand scheme of things. We had so much fun that day, and that really is the most important thing.

Endnote: No matter how polished you plans may be, something will always come up. Have faith in your suppliers and let them do their job. All you have to do is smile and enjoy the company of your guests and your new husband.

You can’t have it all.

Life is all about trade offs.

In exchange for bigger spending power, I have my own private zone where only rules that I wholeheartedly agree to are in place.

I may have lost a sense of backup, financially, but I am forever secure that whatever happens, Alfred’s got my back.

Note to self: Forget about Cebu Pacific’s ridiculously cheap airfare to Shanghai because something better may be in store for you.

Alfred is the new favorite

Signs that my dad has turned around 180 degrees:

1. On his recent trip the the US, he asked me what color of iPod I wanted. Then, he asked what color he should get for Alfred.
2. He bought Alfred something for his ‘wakeboarding’ when we’ve only tried it once.
3. He makes sure that Alfred has eaten already. Otherwise, he would ask my mom to cook for him.
4. He introduces Alfred to his friends not as his son-in-law but his son.
5. He thinks that Alfred should be more ‘firm’ with me.

I love it!

I need focus

It’s been months, heck even years, since I last felt stressed out at work. I realize it’s a happy problem and surely, there must be at least a dozen people who would want to change places with me. But, you can only be happily idle at work for so long. Pretty soon, even YouTube starts to run out.

I honestly feel that workwise, I’m in a crisis right now. It seems that I have wasted so much time on waiting for projects when I could have spent all this time learning a new skill, developing the few technical skills I already have, or actively seeking out the job that would really make me happy.

The thought that one day, I too will find my ideal job is becoming even more elusive. With each day, I become less confident that I can easily find a job, at least one that will pay as much as this one does. After getting used to a certain lifestyle, salary becomes such a huge deciding factor. And, unfortunately, I am not ready for any drastic lifestyle changes just yet.

Isn’t it disturbing that my career goals are becoming more and more unclear as I get older?